Thank You

Joseph Beuys, Matthew Barney, Kiki Smith, Kara Walker, Lorna Simpson, Fred Wilson, Stefan Sagmeister, Neville Brody, Peter Saville, Carrvaggio, Gerard Richter, Thomas Struth, Ray Johnson, The Smiths, The B-52s, Cole Porter, The Cure, Depeche Mode, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Edith Piaf, David Bowie, Derek Jarman, Catherine Breillat, Vikotor + Rolf, Commes Des Garçons, Helmut Lang, Max Huber, Legos, Demitri Martin, Isabella Blow, Aubrey Beardsley, Kiki Smith, They Might Be Giants, Alfred Hitchcock, Stanley Kubric, Frederico Fellini, Criterion Collection, David Cronenberg, Ayrton Senna, Radio Lab, This American Life, New Order, Joy Division, Joan Jett, Tom of Finland, Toulouse Lautrec, Henri Cartier-Breson, Pageant Print and Book Shop, Subway Inn, Tramway Diner, Lever House, The Segrams Building, The Chrysler Building, The Ambassador Bridge, The Electric Company, Solid Gold, Dance Fever, Absolutely Fabulous, Donna Summer, The Dresden Dolls, Chuck Jones, Catherine Denuve, Anne Rice, Tibor Kalman, Emigre, Ray Gun, Christopher Isherwood, Anais Nin, index cards, the sound of slide projectors, David LaChapelle, Vivianne Westwood, John Gallianno, Mr. Pearl, Leigh Bowery, Matthew Bourne, Rufus Wainwright, Ella Fitzgerald, Billie Holiday, Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Stevie Wonder, i-D, Interview, The Face, Apple, the first 10 years of MTV, Jon Stewart, Stephen Cobert, Amy Sedaris, David Sedaris, Sarah Vowell, Le Tigre, LCD Soundsystem, Scissor Sisters, Eryhah Badu, Klaus Nomi, Dally in the Alley, Detroit Institute of Art, Sam's Jams, Moss, Michael Clark, Mondo New York, Paul Rand, Ellen Lupton, Paul Elliman, Edward Tufte, Cabinet, Antonin Artaud, Robert Frank, Edward Hopper, David Byrne, John Waters, Ellen von Unwerth, Sophie Calle, Wallpaper, Alain Robbe-Grillet, George Perec, Ayn Rand, Marquis de Sade, Jean Genet, William Burroughs, Luc Sante, Dennis Cooper, Thomas Mann, Will Shorts, Martha Stewart, John Hughes, Tilda Swinton, Michel Gondry, Spike Jonze, Chris Cunningham, Sister Corita Kent

to be continued…

art, design, music, film, fashion, other, places, architecture, television / radio, books / magazines, people

Justify My Love

I don't hate Valentine's Day

I'm pretty indifferent to Valentine's Day. With a boyfriend, I was pretty indifferent and without a boyfriend I'm pretty indifferent. I do like those packs of Valentine's Day cards grade school kids get to hand out in their class. Those are pretty rad. 

There seems to be just as much anti-V. Day sentiment out there as there is pro, but I really don't care that much about it either way. Giving flowers* and chocolates and talking teddy bears to the one you love because you want to show them how much you love and appreciate them is great! Doing it only because it's V. Day and you feel obliged to just means you're a little bit of a douche.

I love cranberry sauce. Not real cranberry sauce, but the fake jelly kind with the imprint of the can, you know? I love it, but for some reason I would only ever eat it on Thanksgiving. Then it occurred to me a while ago that I could eat it whenever I want. They sell it all year long! I could have fake cranberry sauce in the middle of the summer if I wanted!

It's the summer time jellied cranberry sauce that matters in a relationship.

So I don't really care if I don't get a dozen red roses on Saturday. I really, really hate baby's breath anyway. But, I have been thinking about one particular symbolic gesture that's been nagging at me.

My bed is situated in the corner of my room. The corner. That means one side of the bed is against the wall so only one side has a bedside table. One bedside table. I never really thought about it much until recently. I put that second glass of water, the other pair of glasses, the bottle of lube and so forth on that one table. I don't have someone in my bed every night, (and for the record, I don't know if I even want someone in my bed every single night) but when I do, they have no table of their very own.

I never really thought about it before and it's never really bothered me until now.

Is it a sign? Is it a signal that this bed belongs to one person and one person only? Am I not inviting the possibility that there may be someone who will need his own table for his water and his glasses on a regular basis? Am I saying to whoever is in my bed, "You are only a guest here." It suddenly seems so juvenile to only have one bedside table.

I do have someone else's toothbrush in my holder, but a toothbrush doesn't take up a lot of room. I have room for another table. Don't I? But, if I get that second bedside table, will it just be a reminder of the absence when there isn't a glass of water over there?

* Actually, I absolutely love getting flowers. Anytime.

We regret to inform you...

Thank you for your interest in career opportunities at our company. We strive to find the right person for the right opportunity. At this time, we will not be pursuing you as a candidate for the Senior Print Designer position but we would like you to keep us in mind for future career opportunities.

I got this this morning and as lousy as rejection can be, there was something so very satisfying about this e-mail. I know it's a form letter, but I wanted to send a reply:

Thank you! Thank you for not leading me on anymore. Thank you for explicitly saying that you are not interested in me so I can let you go and move on. You don't even have to explain why, it doesn't matter. But thank you for making your lack of intentions clear. You're not like the rest of them that just disappear into the ether without a word. You have the courage to look me in the eye (sort of) and say, 'thanks, but no thanks.'

But as far as keeping you in mind for future opportunities? I don't have time to wait around for you. I have better things to do and I'm not that needy. I'm fine working for myself for a while. I'm not going to cling to the off-chance you might change your mind later on when the person you did hire doesn't work out or when you find yourself low in staff. 

I will not keep you in mind, because to tell you the truth, I really didn't want to work there anyway.

I just really want a job.

Brisk

I was naked, so I put on a flimsy, knee length robe to walk him out. I turned to give him a platonic "thanks for coming" hug but instead he pushed me towards the open door. The freezing air hit me like a wall. I felt his hand on my back and he pushed me again until I was standing outside, my bare feet on the frozen concrete. I squealed and hopped from foot to foot for a few seconds, but then stood still. I set my feet flat on the ground, just to see how long I could do it. He casually pulled my robe aside and roughly slipped his fingers inside my pussy.

I gasped and laughed under my breath and gasped again with a gust of wind. I did a half-ass scan of the street, enjoying the bite of the air on my bare skin and his fingers digging around inside me. My cunt seemed to be getting hotter to compensate for the cold. I wondered how long I would have to stand there before icicles formed between my legs.

"You're such a whore." He said. Then he pulled out and went on his way without looking back.

I nodded with a little giggle, closed the door and hopped back up the steps.

Toy Review: Womolia

Womolia. It sounds a little like the name of a magical kingdom in a land far, far away inhabited by nothing but gynecologists. It also took for-freaking-ever to charge. That glowing, pulsing charging light had been teasing me for so long, by the time I hit the on button and it actually turned on, I was so relieved I forgot to pay attention to how the thing worked! I just pulled my jeans off, flung myself on the bed and drove it home.

I like vibes that are simple to use since I'm usually using them blindly in the dark. The buttons were easy enough to find and I kept hitting the one with the "plus" sign until it was at maximum speed, like I always do. Nice and strong. Very nice and strong. I have a tendency to go right for the clit and stay there. But the nifty grooves along the tip encouraged me to explore the rest of my poor, neglected vulva. I added a little lube to smooth it along and slipped it inside for a pleasant soft pounding. The wide tip and curve worked the insides just right. A rub, rub here and a rub, rub there... nice, long orgasm and done!

With a smile and a sigh, I pressed the on/off button to put it away for another day and realized there was a whole world of variable speeds I didn't know existed! Oops. There were a few variations of the "thump, thump disco" kind and more interestingly was a gradual increasing vibration I'm calling the "European Ambulance Siren." There are nine styles to play with, but these would have to wait for another day since I was quite sleepy.

There are a lot of options in a very simple package and I like that. I don't like a lot of bells and whistles with my toys and this vibe does a lot with an elegant, nice design.

But, for real. It took like, two days to charge.